Merry Christmas from the doctors and staff of Johnson Optometric Associates!! This year, we present a dramatic reading of a slighty-altered ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas, where Dr. May & Dr. Martin successfully treat Santa Claus for a very serious eye problem!! We hope you enjoy, and more importantly, have a great Christmas season!

Written by Andrew May & Barrett Martin

‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the office,
Drs. Martin and May were both feeling cautious
For the day had gone by without a single eye worry,
Narry a red eye or eyes that were blurry;
The sweet kindly staff were all manning the lobby,
While visions of sugar plums made them feel groggy,
And Martin in his sweater, and May in his hat,
Had just settled down for a clinical chat
When through the front door there arose such a clatter,
Staff sprang from their chairs to see what was the matter.
Away to the front they both flew like a flash,
While Cara checked insurance asking Santa for cash.
His eye was as red as his large Santa suit,
And he told us the pain was very acute
When, what to our wondering eyes should appear,
His merry jolly face had become one of fear,
“The children,” he said, “they must get their toys,
For they’ve all been such good little girls and boys.
For if I can’t see, my sleigh I can’t fly,
Not even Rudolph’s nose is as red as my eye”
So we patted his back and we gave him a grin
“You’ll be fine, Santa, just come on in”
He sat in our chair and he looked a bit stressed
“Before we get started we have one request.”
We pulled out our phones and we opened an app
And we each took a selfie on Santa’s lap
As we looked in his eye it became very plain
Under his lid was a large candy cane
Now Martin turned to May and he said, “Holy cow!”
“Have you seen this before?” “Not until now!!”
“Call Hammond, call Hartman, and call Dr. Bob”
“We need their advice to help with this job”
While May put in drops, Martin stayed on the phone
While they worked on a plan to solve the unknown
Hammond exclaimed, “How did that fit?”
While Dr. Hartman had to admit
That in 38 years he’d never before
Seen anything like that come through his door
Dr. Bob said, “We’ve got to be swift.
So that Santa can go to deliver his gifts.”
So Martin and May, with all of their might
Worked to get Santa back to his night
They pulled and they tugged, Santa said “Ho, ho, ho!”
“Now that you’re finished I’m ready to go”
He sprung to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew, like the down of a thistle:
But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight-
“Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!”